1. Well the answer to this is simple enough. it's just what everyone calls me in real life due to no one wanting to acknowledge my real name. it is much too exotic sounding for anglo-saxons to pronounce. diego turns into die-gone, or perhaps, a joke about eggo waffles pops into their minds and they feel the urge to say point out the similarities, as though they are the only ones who lived through that era of commercials. i've learned to anticipate this moment and throat punch them with my cabbage smelling hands right before they do. it's like im preventing thought crime.